After the “honeymoon period” of beginning an instrument is over, making sure your kids practice naturally becomes more difficult. The good news is if you follow some basic guidelines it can get easier.
If you’re lucky enough to be reading this while your child is still in the “honeymoon” phase of playing, you can start getting these into place before the practice wars begin!
Call it PLAYING, not practicing.
A frequent question is, “How do we get our child to practice? “I always stop them politely and say, “Please, say ‘Play your instrument’ not ‘Practice your instrument.’
How easy, that a simple shift of words can change someones attitude toward an activity! What sounds more appealing to you – “It’s time to play!” or “It’s time to practice!”? Obvious choice.
With children even up through middle school age you can use game-like tactics to keep it feeling like its “playtime.” Of course you’ll do real work too, but the biggest hurdle most times will be just getting your child to sit down to start the practice session. Once they’re ready at their instrument, the rest is usually cake.
Divide Practice Time
With today’s busy families, it often works well to divide practice session into two or more segments, particularly with a young child who is still developing their attention span. Two 15-minute practices–or even three 10-minute sessions–can be more productive than one 30-minute sitting.
Divide the material for variety, too. For example, if there are two songs and a technique exercise, work at one song the first time and the other song at the second practice time, playing a little of the technical exercise during both.
At Home Immediately After the Lessons
If students (adults as well as children) did the following after each lesson, they would find their progress accelerate rapidly!
After you return home, sit down with your child and play through the lesson assignment one time – only once! This should take 10 minutes at most. For each part of the assignment, ask your child to describe what she is supposed to do and why and then have her play it for you. This will acquaint you with what you should be hearing and how you should be hearing it, and your child will know that you are aware of exactly what the teacher has requested. If there are any questions, you can call/email the teacher right away for clarification rather than let the child ignore an element of his assignment all week (or worse: do it incorrectly and later have to un-learn!).
Your child reaps several things from this post-lesson review. It is a tangible reminder that you support their efforts and are vitally interested in the content of what she is doing. The most important benefit is that the immediate repetition of the assigned material ensures almost 100% retention of what the teacher said at the lesson”
If you like, count this session as a day’s practice, so your child may have “a day off” another time later in the week!
Just remember: you need to be directly involved on the bench with your child.
A Consistent Practice Time
Most students benefit from a consistent piano practice time. Adults find a routine helps them shoehorn in all they must do; children draw security from routine.
Schoolwork is first priority. If there is a large assignment that evening, there may be no time for practice because schoolwork is most important. After schoolwork comes instrument practicing/playing, however. When that is complete, then there’s time to play outside, play on the iPad, watch TV, or whatever else they’d like to do.
It’s important that children know that music study falls right after schoolwork in the day’s hierarchy. If there are daily household chores the child is expected to take care of, these come third. They should understand that some days their homework load and their music time may preclude most or all of their playtime. Not every day, surely, but sometimes. They should understand and accept this before study begins, so they can’t try to plead ignorance when faced with a situation like this.
Of course, children may “unwind” by having a snack or changing clothes, but right after that, it’s time to hit the books. No getting sidetracked with the computer or playing with a friend or watching an afternoon TV show. This type of routine really teaches your child responsibility!
At-Home Quiet Zone
It goes without saying that other family members should not be in the “music” room during practice time. Nor should they be causing a racket elsewhere in the house. Not only is the noise itself distracting, but your child’s curiosity will be piqued by the possibility that something interesting is going on elsewhere and she will be distracted and restless. Most families find that practice time for one child is a perfect homework time (or story time) for another.
Use Rewards
Try offering up something they will likely be getting anyway: a cookie, their allowance, a trip to the park, whatever works. You can even use a future large present (summer camp, a sleepover, a toy they have always wanted, an animal) to motivate them to practice as they earn their reward over time. Make a chart and have them practice 5 times a week for X amount of minutes for X amount of weeks and remind them they are working towards a goal to get {insert bribery item of choice}.
Eventually being able to play their instrument well will be it’s own reward – but you have to get there somehow!
Use Consequences
Set rules that they must practice before they engage in their favorite activities. This concept will be so easy to instill if you follow the suggestions above – Homework, Music, Playtime…. eventually it will come naturally. Before that happens, you can help the child understand the importance of following their routine, and managing their responsibilities (homework/practicing/chores etc.)
Every child has something they normally get to do that they get excited about. It could be going out to play with friends or getting to watch their favorite TV shows. Set rules so that they know if they don’t practice before the TV show or before they go out with their friends, they will have to miss out.
Dealing with Rebellion about Piano Playing Time
Short answer: Stay the course!
Sometimes it will be difficult, and you’ll feel like throwing in the towel. (Enough! The hassle isn’t worth it! Go ahead and quit!!) Don’t. You’re doing the right thing, and your child will thank you forever for providing the instrument, the opportunity to study, and your resolve to teach them responsibility when they want to quit something that isn’t easy. Learning an instrument study isn’t easy. If it were, everyone would be doing it.
Plus, have you ever heard an adult say their parents let them quite music and they were GLAD about it? No – never. Every single one of them says they regret they ever quit.
Your children will thank you, so stay the course when things get rocky. And they will. Remember you’re giving your child a gift that can’t be taken away and one that will bring a lifetime of joy…even when it seems the direct opposite is true while you’re in the process!
source: Martha Beth Lewis, Ph.D. & Jan Taylor http://www.kitsappianolessons.com/about.htm